超级搞笑英语笑话小短文(优推4篇)
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英语幽默故事小短文【第一篇】
Ashamed Soldier Peter joined the army when he was eighteen, and for several months he was taught how to be a good soldier. He did quite well in everything except shooting. One day he and his friends were practicing their shooting, and all of them were doing quite well except Peter. After he had shot at the target nine times and had not hit it once, the officer who was trying to teach the young soldiers to shoot said, "You're quite hopeless, Peter! Don't waste your last bullet too! Go behind that wall and shoot yourself with it!" Peter felt ashamed. He went behind the wall, and a few seconds later the officer and the other young soldiers heard the sound of a shot. "Heavens!" the officer said. "Has that silly man really shot himself?" He ran behind the wall anxiously, but Peter was all right. "I'm sorry, sir," he said, "but I missed again."
英语幽默故事小短文【第二篇】
An Advertisement for Modern Bicycle Tom saw an advertisement in a newspaper for a beautiful modern bicycle which cost 50, so he went to the shop to have a look. After examining the bicycle carefully, Tom turned to the shopkeeper and said, "There isn't a lamp on this bicycle, but there was one on the bicycle in your advertisement." "Yes, sir," answered the shopkeeper, "but the lamp isn't included in the price of the bicycle. It's an extra." "Not included in the price of bicycle?" Tom said angrily, "But that's not honest. If the lamp's in the advertisement, it should have been included in the price you gave there." "Well, sir," answered the shopkeeper calmly, "there is also a girl on the bicycle in our advertisement, shall we supply one for you too?"
有关英语幽默小短文【第三篇】
So this guy goes into a pet store and sees a beautiful parrot but it has a blue string handing from one foot and a red one from the other. He thinks this is a little strange so he asks the shopkeeper what the strings are for.
有个人在宠物店发现了一只美丽的鹦鹉,但是它的一只脚上牵着蓝色的绳子,而另一只牵着红色的。这个人觉得有些奇怪,就去问店主绳子是做什么的?
"Well this is a highly trained parrot" the shopkeeper replies. "If you pull the red string he talks in French, if you pull the blue string he talks in English".
“噢,这是一只训练有素的鹦鹉。”店主回答道。“如果你拉动红绳子,它会讲法语,如果你拉动蓝绳子,它就讲英语”
"Wow" exclaims the man shopping, "That's really neat. What happens if you pull them both at the same time?"
“哇塞,”这个人感到很惊讶。“太厉害了。那如果你同时拉呢?”
"I fall off my perch you idiot!" exclaims the parrot.
“我会从架子上跌倒的!你个笨蛋!”鹦鹉回答道。
有关英语幽默小短文【第四篇】
A little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"
一个小女孩问她的妈妈,“妈妈,我可以带狗狗去街角散步吗?”
Mom replies, "No, because she is in heat."
妈妈回答说,“不,因为她有些热。”
"What's that mean?" asked the child.
“那是什么意思?”小女孩问。
"Go ask your father", answered the mother, "I think he's in the garage."
“问你爸爸去吧,”妈妈回答道,“他应该在车库里。”
The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."
于是小女孩就去了车库里,说“爸爸,我可以带Belle去街角散散步吗?我问了妈妈,但她说狗狗有些热,让我来问问你。”
Dad said, "Bring Belle over here." He took a rag, soaked it with gasoline, and scrubbed the dog's backside with it and said, "Okay, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time around the block."
爸爸说,“把Belle带过来吧。”他拿了跟布条,用汽油浸过,然后绑在了狗狗的背上用力擦了擦狗狗的背,说“好了,你现在可以去了,但是得一直拿着Belle的皮带,并且只能在街角走一次。”
The little girl left, and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Surprised, Dad asked, "Where's Belle?"
小女孩离开了,几分钟后便回来了,狗没有一起回来。爸爸感到很惊讶,问道,“Belle呢?”
The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway down the block, so another dog is pushing her home."
小女孩说,“她半路就把背上的汽油挥发光了,然后另外一只狗就'奋勇前进'了。”